Why rejection doesn't need to be the end of your story

Sometimes rejection is just the beginning!

I can't remember if I told you this but  I've always wanted to write a book.  I think most of us have that sense that we have at least one book bubbling away.  Unfortunately until last year, I couldn't really work out what I'd write about.  Then I came across David Hawkins "Power vs Force".  The concept is that all humans resonate at a frequency and we attract people of a similar frequency.  Fascinating!  

 The icky emotions like shame and guilt resonate at a low level, where joy and happiness are higher.  This is the stuff we talk about all of the time, but here it was presented by a scientist.  Having half an idea in my head, I decided I definitely needed to explore how to get my (unwritten - small detail!) book published. So I googled how to get a book deal with Hay House and by complete serendipity there was a writer's workshop in Edinburgh within 2 weeks.  Every attendee was given the opportunity to submit a book proposal.  

Yes it coincided with my holiday in Cornwall (could it be any further away!) and it was the weekend of national transport strikes but I was on a mission.  This was absolutely meant to be!  Undeterred I rearranged my travel plans, got in the car and pretended to be a serious writer for the weekend.

From September to March I beavered away on my book proposal and managed to get it in with a minute to spare.  It turned out that I'd been so obsessed with the content, I'd failed to realise I needed to do a promotional video.  On 26th May, I waited for my answer.  I didn't quite guard my phone all day because through sheer incompetence I went on a workshop leaving my phone at home.  

It was only when I got home and checked my calls that it came.  Something far, far worse than rejection!!!!  Nothing.  Absolutely nothing. I guess someone somewhere had the phone call I'd been waiting for, but for me I was left in that little space between rejection and 5% hope.   

So what did I do next?  How did I use all of my carefully crafted mindfulness skills to channel this disappointment?  Well obviously I hit the red wine and wallowed in my own misery.  Sometimes we just need a little bit of a wallow - it's definitely a thing.  At that time, I really didn't think I'd get over it, or that I'd know what to do with this vacuum that I'd cleared in anticipation of my new writing project.

But gradually things began to shift and I remembered the feedback I'd had when I'd been discussing my sample chapter with a friend.   She said the words were funny, but so much funnier when you imagine me saying them.  That little nugget set my thoughts going off in a different direction.

So I'm taking all of the stuff I want to learn about like energy, auras, the human biofield and human vibration.  I'm going to do the research and bring it to life through videos, podcasts and where relevant guided practices. 

I think it'll work better that way and it certainly feels a lot less rigid than working to deadlines set by someone else.  I really struggle with being on camera but somethings we just have to get over. 

So it turns out that sometimes being told we can't do something can be a powerful motivator. 

If you are struggling with this then firstly I'm impressed that you got to the end of this story!

Secondly, rejection is a powerful emotion because it threatens our sense of belonging and that really dips into our primitive needs to belong to our tribe in order to survive.

Lastly, but not trivial at all, no doesn't have to be the end of your story.  You are not defined by your ideas and they can be re-imagined anytime. 

Whatever you are up to this weekend, have a lovely one.  Don't let anyone tell you, you can't do it.